Patience Sold Separately

Patience Sold Separately

Fully Caffeinated / Water Bottle- 7G
$2.00
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Patience Sold Separately

Patience Sold Separately

$2.00
Sanity (Caffeine) Level
Chaos Size
Patience Sold Separately. πŸŠπŸπŸ‘πŸΉ

Orange β€’ Tropical Punch β€’ Pineapple β€’ Peach

You tried being patient.
It didn’t stick.

Patience Sold Separately. is bright, fruity, and just chaotic enough to get you through whatever is testing your last nerve today.

🍊 Orange brings a bold, citrusy kick
🍹 Tropical punch adds that juicy, high-energy sweetness
🍍 Pineapple keeps it fresh and vibrant
πŸ‘ Peach smooths it out with a mellow finish

It’s giving:
β€œI’m doing my best… but my best has limits.”

πŸ“ Choose Your Size

πŸ’§ Water Bottle Size (7g)
Holding it together… barely.
Designed to mix into a 16.9 oz water bottle for a lighter, refreshing tea.

✨ Tumbler Size (12g)
Full-strength coping mechanism.
Designed to mix into a 30+ oz tumbler for a full-day, full-chaos situation.

πŸ§‹ Mixing Instructions: Tumbler (12G)
β€’ Dissolve packet in 4–6 oz warm water
β€’ Add cold water + ice to reach desired size
β€’ Shake, sip, and proceed with caution

⚑ Caffeine Info:
Patience Sold Separately contains approximately 140 of caffeine. This tea contains caffeine from green tea extract powder and caffeine anhydrous. It also contains about 8 calories and 4 carbs per packet. This mix contains Calcium, Potassium, Niacin, Vitamin B6, Folic Acid, Pantothenic Acid, and Magnesium (12 gram size). Also available in half caffeinated and decaffeinated options.


πŸ’₯ Optional Power Ups:
Customize your chaos with add-ins that may support energy, focus, gut health, and more

πŸ–€ The Chaotic Fine Print:
β€’ Sugar-free (sweetened with stevia and/or sucralose)
β€’ Made in small, handmade batches
β€’ Not medical advice β€” these statements have not been evaluated by the FDA
β€’ Please enjoy responsibly (we recommend no more than 1–2 fully caffeinated teas per day)

Because patience isn’t always included… but caffeine helps.

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